corporal | ✖ voice ✖ oo3 ✖

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✖ voice ✖ oo3 ✖

( Levi's voice is aggravated when he clicks on his PokéGear, although really, it's not all that much different from his standard tone. )

Oi. My Pokémon have made eggs. I wasn't trying to do that, but it doesn't seem like they much care about my own intentions. The fuck am I supposed to do with these?

I don't need thirty fucking cats. ( There's a short pause for an almost melodramatic sigh, then. )

I'm sure they'll be shitting all over the place if I end up with too many of them. Do I hand them out? Sell them? Shit. ( After a few more seconds, Levi makes a sound like a 'tch' because wow complaining takes so much work nobody knows how hard his life is. )

Let me know if you want a cat or whatever.

( Aaaand click. )

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[Oh... Guess a girl's social skills / egg buyer knowledge is good sometimes because she's been busy with trying to get a few more pokemon from other breeders or people with eggs anyway.]

Corporal, you could sell them, give them away for free or trade them for pokemon, that you don't have.

[Yes, she knows trade might a weird term for him (here), but she can explain in a bit. Meanwhile she's tempted to come praise his kittens for good work. ...and pretty sure 30 was not the real amount because wow, that would be insane from two kittens.]

... well, you gotta pay for food an' places to stay while you're travellin', right?

[... what do you even say to this post? Komaeda doesn't know. But he responds anyway, because he's Komaeda.]

Well, first of all, I think you should try calming down a little.

—I guess I hadn't thought about that. I've been using a fucking tent.

[ levi is also a fan of excessive violence in discipline

this is a match made in heaven ok ]

—I suppose I hadn't considered that, although it seemed unusually cruel.

[ the degree to which levi is frowning rn is subcritical. ]

Be my guest.

—wait, then how do they populate at all? [ inb4 levi learns about pandas and fuckin loses it ]

[ They should trade ideas back and forth. Discuss some hard discipline plans over a cup of coffee. You know, typical coffee talk topics. ]

Honestly, if they are not behaving, then you have to show them who is in charge. And if they don't listen, release them.

A tent? Really? Ain't that too cold this time a' year?

[ Levi's reply text takes a while, since he's staring at all this information with a sort of self-hating awe. Holy fuck. This entire time, you stubborn butthole, you could have learned this shit and not been walking everywhere on foot like a scrub. ]

Thanks for all this information. [ that sure is easier to type out for this guy than it is to say aloud... ]

Do I need more than two Pokemon, if I want to level them and acquire these badges?

[ thank god, because here's levi, still with two whole pokemon. three of course once their christmas shenanigans roll around, but yeeeep he's chillin with his two and HE DOESN'T KNOW A DAMN THING ABOUT THEM so petra you best get ready to be an educator ]

What do you mean, trade them? I can just give them to someone who will give me another one in exchange?

[ haha THAT'S AS GOOD AN EXCUSE AS ANY. ]

I don't seem calm?

[ Oh man, so true. How does William feel about tea? bc Levi's huge into his black tea. so into it that they made him his own tea apparently.... they're basically soulmates lbr ]

I wish it were simple enough that I could just release them—but unfortunately I'm generally their military superior.

[ William's from London, of course he loves tea. Though he is a coffee drinker too. Gotta stay awake to reap souls all day and night. ]

At least you take your job seriously.

[ Why can't you work for him, Levi. Honestly. ]

Edited 2015-01-03 08:33 (UTC)

[ it's obvious that levi is loathe to admit this when he says it aloud, but still, he certainly says it. ]

The cats are warmer than they look.

[ awww yeaaahhh and damn why is his job so much more exciting than levi's, levi wonders ]

And how do your subordinates behave?

[ A very audible huff. Some of them try but... don't even get him started on Grell. ]

I will say this: They need to learn to separate their personal and professional lives.

Good job on the babies. [ Clearly not directed at him...

Ah, but then he's talking to her about populating. ]

By coaxing them, of course. Sometimes with food, other times by leaving them alone in your bedroom...

You sound aggravated. Also, you're cursing, which certainly doesn't help.

[Thanks, Captain Obvious!]

[ ... c: ]

Yeah, aren't they? When she ain't sparkin' up all over the place, Kirarin's real good for nappin' with.

[Well you gotta learn somewhere, Levi.]

More than two would be preferable. You can carry up to six for a reason.

[She's so ready to be an educator! But really, she's trying to gather some for traveling and fighting already. Go figure why a girl, who is extremely protective of you would do that. ]

Yes, they'll catch something you don't have unless they already have something like that and want to give it away. And if they're in a different city, those weird machines in the PokeCenter help with sending the pokemon over to both.

[ that gets a small, low laugh. ]

They're not great at steering clear of dramatics, I take it?

I can't begin to fathom why you know so much about their mating habits.

[ hahaha

there's definitely a pause there on levi's side of the line as he makes a 'tch' sound at the observation. ]

Unremarkably, I don't think I sound any different in that broadcast than I normally do.

[ well this asshole here is definitely not helping his own case... way 2 go ]

—what do you mean by sparking; like fire?

[ then; ]

Don't tell anyone I admitted that shit about the cats.

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